ArcticWildMan
08-20-2002, 11:44 AM
An old man was sitting on a bench at the mall. A young man walked up to the bench and sat down. He had spiked hair in all different colors: green, red, orange, blue, yellow.
The old man just stared at him. The young man said "What's the matter old man, never done anything wild in your life?
The old man replied, "Got drunk once and had sex with a parrot. I was just wondering if you were my kid.
A Texas State trooper pulls over a pickup truck on I-40 and says to the driver, "Got any ID?" The driver says, "'Bout what?"
Two Texans are walking toward each other, and one is carrying a sack. When they meet, one says, "Hey Tommy Ray, whatcha got in th' bag?" "Jes' some chickens." "If I guesses how many they is, kin I have one?" "Shoot, if ya guesses right, I'll give you both of 'em!" "OK. Ummmmm...five?"
A Texan came home and found his house on fire. He rushed next door, telephoned the fire department and shouted, "Hurry over here-muh house is on fahr!" "OK," replied the fireman, "how do we get there?" "Shucks, don't you fellers still have those big red trucks?"
Ida Mae passed away and Bubba called 911. The 911-operator told Bubba that she would send someone out right away. "Where do you live?" asked the operator. Bubba replied, "At the end of Eucalyptus Drive." The operator asked, "Can you spell that for me?" After a long pause, Bubba said, "How 'bout I drag her over to Oak Street and you pick her up there?"
Did you hear about the $3,000,000 Texas State Lottery? The winner gets $3 a year for a million years.
The old man just stared at him. The young man said "What's the matter old man, never done anything wild in your life?
The old man replied, "Got drunk once and had sex with a parrot. I was just wondering if you were my kid.
A Texas State trooper pulls over a pickup truck on I-40 and says to the driver, "Got any ID?" The driver says, "'Bout what?"
Two Texans are walking toward each other, and one is carrying a sack. When they meet, one says, "Hey Tommy Ray, whatcha got in th' bag?" "Jes' some chickens." "If I guesses how many they is, kin I have one?" "Shoot, if ya guesses right, I'll give you both of 'em!" "OK. Ummmmm...five?"
A Texan came home and found his house on fire. He rushed next door, telephoned the fire department and shouted, "Hurry over here-muh house is on fahr!" "OK," replied the fireman, "how do we get there?" "Shucks, don't you fellers still have those big red trucks?"
Ida Mae passed away and Bubba called 911. The 911-operator told Bubba that she would send someone out right away. "Where do you live?" asked the operator. Bubba replied, "At the end of Eucalyptus Drive." The operator asked, "Can you spell that for me?" After a long pause, Bubba said, "How 'bout I drag her over to Oak Street and you pick her up there?"
Did you hear about the $3,000,000 Texas State Lottery? The winner gets $3 a year for a million years.