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View Full Version : FINAL: Round 1: Mr.Reality defeats 4thandlong 14-11



lordofgun
05-11-2003, 11:22 PM
Round 1: Mr. Reality vs. 4thandlong

Round 1 will be freestyle. Do whatever the heck you want. Just make sure it's funny and insulting.

Each contestant will take turns insulting each other. This round will consist of 6 turns apiece.

4thandlong will go first.

4thAndLong
05-12-2003, 01:20 PM
Considering you barely post here and about 100 of the members here (including fin fans) can smack you down like blinky did to that fish.

First of all, intelligence. What is intelligence? Is this it?

http://www.billszone.com/fanzone/showthread.php?s=&threadid=17079

Might wanna read the rules first. LOG starts the thread. I guess I shouldn't expect that much from a Lion fan. After all, most Lion fans are either illiterate or on welfare, or both.

What's with the homo jokes? Got something you need to cover up. We all know what really goes on at Zbud. It's worse than Brian's porno over there. Kinda reminds of that bondage slut on Joe Millionare, except it's probably uglier.

I'll wait for trailor park social activites (AKA Zbud's annual picnic) to end so you can respond now. How long does that last again? I was wondering why BTP was here, isn't he involved in the activites? or did he get off because he forgot the tissues.

Mr.Reality
05-12-2003, 04:15 PM
Jesus. I haven't seen a mismatch like this since Vern Troyer opened for Rodney Dangerfield.

What rules are you refering to, Windtunnel Head? Looks like he said to do whatever we want to me. You already crying foul? I make the rules around here, and rule number one is no snivelling. Now get down and suck the sweat out of my socks.

4thandLong's posts are about as compelling as watching 20 ants play Chinese soccer with an olive, but the olive alone is probably more interesting than 4thandLong. The only thing with less staying power than one of 4thandLong's jokes was the Charlie Brown Arbor Day special. If he were ever selected to be in a Hollywood Horror film he'd be cast as the bump in the night. He has about as much chance of moving on to the second round as a Mummy in nikes in a strip search at a Bangladeshi textiles plant.

But you're pretty funny, 4thandLong. I haven't laughed so hard since I stepped on 7 bees while juggling four broken bottles. It would take more than the hammer on the thumb routine to get you to say something original.

By the way, 4thandLong's favorite movies are Yentl, Ishtar, and the Ron LeFlore Story. But he's kind of crazy that way. He's wild!

4thAndLong
05-12-2003, 05:11 PM
Originally posted by Mr.Reality
Jesus. I haven't seen a mismatch like this since Vern Troyer opened for Rodney Dangerfield.

What rules are you refering to, Windtunnel Head? Looks like he said to do whatever we want to me. You already crying foul? I make the rules around here, and rule number one is no snivelling. Now get down and suck the sweat out of my socks.

4thandLong's posts are about as compelling as watching 20 ants play Chinese soccer with an olive, but the olive alone is probably more interesting than 4thandLong. The only thing with less staying power than one of 4thandLong's jokes was the Charlie Brown Arbor Day special. If he were ever selected to be in a Hollywood Horror film he'd be cast as the bump in the night. He has about as much chance of moving on to the second round as a Mummy in nikes in a strip search at a Bangladeshi textiles plant.

But you're pretty funny, 4thandLong. I haven't laughed so hard since I stepped on 7 bees while juggling four broken bottles. It would take more than the hammer on the thumb routine to get you to say something original.

By the way, 4thandLong's favorite movies are Yentl, Ishtar, and the Ron LeFlore Story. But he's kind of crazy that way. He's wild!

Thats some great insults when the best you can come up with is,"get something original." Especially when your posts are about as original as reality TV. :puke:

Hmmm...Did you ever wonder why no one else had threads going? Try something called common sense. Here's an example of common sense: The Lions suck.

Try some real insults, you're getting smacked silly here. http://mywebpages.comcast.net/mrspooky/penguin.gif

You're insults are about as predictable as the man who walked into a bar, ouch joke. You sound like a broken record. I dont know how many times I hear you say the word original.

How is the trailor park these days? Did they install that new "build an outhouse, get 10 free hours of porn" feature installed yet? I knew you were looking forward to that. It's like I'm trying to insult a kid that keeps using stupid references. Here's one for you. You're about as smart as the guy who thought he'd make money off eight legged freaks.

You had me thinking, what kind of person are you MR? You have to be one of the biggest pussies ever. Hiding online? :hamrhed: Someone who is too afraid to show who they are on a site I dont even go to has to be a loser.

Mr.Reality
05-12-2003, 05:17 PM
6:34am Urinates
6:38am Goes back to bed
12:53pm Urinates again.
12:59pm Goes back to bed again.
3:15pm Calls ManPower and tells them he’ll have to miss his three thirty appointment. “Something came up,” he says.
3:16pm Masturbates
3:16:23pm Sneaks over to the neighbor’s porch and steals the funny pages from their newspaper.
5:00pm Finishes the funny pages and fries up some Spam for brunch.
6:00pm Visits a few internet boards, then comes back to BillsZone and plagiarizes everything he just read.
7:00pm Turns on the VHS machine and watches his favorite episodes of Real World that he recorded three years ago.
8:00pm Writes a letter to the Don Beebe fan clup.
9:00pm Uses one of Don Beebe’s quotes in an insult tournament.
9:30pm Takes a nap.
10:30pm Plays a game of Battleship against himself.
11:00pm Celebrates his hard fought Battleship victory with a 40 of Old English.
12:00am Passes out in a drunken stupor.

4thAndLong
05-12-2003, 05:36 PM
Originally posted by Mr.Reality
6:34am Urinates
6:38am Goes back to bed
12:53pm Urinates again.
12:59pm Goes back to bed again.
3:15pm Calls ManPower and tells them he’ll have to miss his three thirty appointment. “Something came up,” he says.
3:16pm Masturbates
3:16:23pm Sneaks over to the neighbor’s porch and steals the funny pages from their newspaper.
5:00pm Finishes the funny pages and fries up some Spam for brunch.
6:00pm Visits a few internet boards, then comes back to BillsZone and plagiarizes everything he just read.
7:00pm Turns on the VHS machine and watches his favorite episodes of Real World that he recorded three years ago.
8:00pm Writes a letter to the Don Beebe fan clup.
9:00pm Uses one of Don Beebe’s quotes in an insult tournament.
9:30pm Takes a nap.
10:30pm Plays a game of Battleship against himself.
11:00pm Celebrates his hard fought Battleship victory with a 40 of Old English.
12:00pm Passes out in a drunken stupor.

Once again, you prove you're an idiot. 3:16:23 PM?

I wouldn't be suprised if you go to BOA's highschool, or even is his English teacher. Try putting some thought into insults and not copying them off of another site. I have seen alot of schedules like that. I'm still wondering why you call me unoriginal and you continue to post things that you could find on the teletubbies website.

Mr.Reality
05-12-2003, 06:08 PM
Hi guys. Mr. Reality here, just wasting time until 4thandLong stops verbally molesting himself. I don’t believe I’ve ever encountered such a whiner. No siree. Anybody see a trend here?

“Cheater! Cheater! You didn’t read the rules!”

“What’s with all the homo jokes?!!”

“You can only say original once! You’ve used up your quota!”

My god man! I need a new statistician. My last one wasn’t paying attention to my word count! He’s fired!

One big long, drawn out, obnoxious, empirical whine from the depths of what 4thandLong used to call a life. That’ll sober you up. I think we’ve finally found a natural substitute for methadone.

4thandLong has some of the most eloquent comebacks you’ve ever seen since Horseshack. But you gotta remember whom we’re talking about here. This is the guy who holds a prism up to a rainbow thinking he can improve plaid. This is the guy who got fired from his one managerial job at McDonald’s when he tried to invent the meat-less double cheeseburger. This is a guy who sold his original copy of Huckleberry Finn but saves all his newspapers, because the price on Huckleberry Finn said 10 cents and the newspapers say 35 cents, and he figures he’s profiting a quarter with every copy saved

This is a guy who doesn’t mind the nickname halitosis cloud.

4thAndLong
05-12-2003, 07:12 PM
Originally posted by Mr.Reality
Hi guys. Mr. Reality here, just wasting time until 4thandLong stops verbally molesting himself. I don’t believe I’ve ever encountered such a whiner. No siree. Anybody see a trend here?

“Cheater! Cheater! You didn’t read the rules!”

“What’s with all the homo jokes?!!”

“You can only say original once! You’ve used up your quota!”

My god man! I need a new statistician. My last one wasn’t paying attention to my word count! He’s fired!

One big long, drawn out, obnoxious, empirical whine from the depths of what 4thandLong used to call a life. That’ll sober you up. I think we’ve finally found a natural substitute for methadone.

4thandLong has some of the most eloquent comebacks you’ve ever seen since Horseshack. But you gotta remember whom we’re talking about here. This is the guy who holds a prism up to a rainbow thinking he can improve plaid. This is the guy who got fired from his one managerial job at McDonald’s when he tried to invent the meat-less double cheeseburger. This is a guy who sold his original copy of Huckleberry Finn but saves all his newspapers, because the price on Huckleberry Finn said 10 cents and the newspapers say 35 cents, and he figures he’s profiting a quarter with every copy saved

This is a guy who doesn’t mind the nickname halitosis cloud.

Wow, did you think of that all by yourself? Maybe Burger King can give you an all expense paid 2 day trip to Haiti.

Funny how when you twist words around, you can almost make that person look like an idiot, eh?

Lets see.

“Cheater! Cheater! You didn’t read the rules!”

What I really said: You're an idiot, you read the rules before you be a moron.

“What’s with all the homo jokes?!!”

What I really said: Damn, you make alot of homo jokes. Got something to hide. (Notice, he didn't answer, and he layed off them)

“You can only say original once! You’ve used up your quota!”

What I really said: You sure do keep repeating yourself, try using some imagination in insults.

"One big long, drawn out, obnoxious, empirical whine from the depths of what 4thandLong used to call a life. That’ll sober you up. I think we’ve finally found a natural substitute for methadone."

I'm sorry, I'll stop whining when somebody calls me out for what I really am. Oh, wait... :dizzy:

I find it quite humorous that someone who has proven his stupidity over and over again in this thread can try and say someone else is dumb. Your probably think Shaq was good in Kazaam.

I can just picture what you do in between turns. You have more porn sites bookmarked than Hugh Hefner. Get the tissues and lube out.

I'll let you end your "jackin off session" so you can go copy an insult off the web somewhere.


:eek:

Mr.Reality
05-12-2003, 07:46 PM
Originally posted by 4thAndLong
Wow, did you think of that all by yourself? Maybe Burger King can give you an all expense paid 2 day trip to Haiti.

That's a pretty hefty price to pay for a case of the runs.


Originally posted by 4thAndLong
Funny how when you twist words around, you can almost make that person look like an idiot, eh?

Lets see.

“Cheater! Cheater! You didn’t read the rules!”

What I really said: You're an idiot, you read the rules before you be a moron.

I'm glad to have that cleared up by the three-dimensional replica of boredom.


Originally posted by 4thAndLong
“What’s with all the homo jokes?!!”

What I really said: Damn, you make alot of homo jokes. Got something to hide. (Notice, he didn't answer, and he layed off them)

Apparently my opponent is adverse to San Fransisco jokes. I am relieved that he's taken the trouble to point out the immense differences of our posts.



Originally posted by 4thAndLong
“You can only say original once! You’ve used up your quota!”

What I really said: You sure do keep repeating yourself, try using some imagination in insults.

Translation: Give me a soft ball.



Originally posted by 4thAndLong
I find it quite humorous that someone who has proven his stupidity over and over again in this thread can try and say someone else is dumb.

I find it quite humorous that the same person has made the case so convincingly.


Originally posted by 4thAndLong
You have more porn sites bookmarked than Hugh Hefner.

Strong words from somebody who idolizes Anna Nicole Smith's talents.

4thAndLong
05-12-2003, 08:07 PM
Hey Mr Reality,

I see you've used all your insults already. Starting to get defensive.

I can just picture you right now. Somewhere in Detroit, having 5 windows of BFZ open with 5 different aliases, getting ready to vote. Going over to Zbud's begging for votes, and having your little friends come and help you. I wouldn't be suprised if your smack is coming from Mr Angry. If that isn't you of course.

I'd rather idolize Anna Nicole Smith's talents than worship Marilyn Manson.

http://4thandlong.finheaven.com/mrreal.gif

Mr.Reality
05-12-2003, 08:25 PM
Originally posted by 4thAndLong
Hey Mr Reality,

I see you've used all your insults already.
Alas, but you have miscalculated yet once again. While you were reading up on Freud and Einstein's theory of relativity, and trying to rationalize how you could combine the two theories into 4thandLong's fellatio ratio, the rest of us have moved on to steady, though less sensational careers.

While the study of lickchops and meatwhistles may engross the imagination of the modern professional yardsalesman with nothing to do than shop for used shot putts and rotors; the rest of us have had to slip into the dreary everyday 9-5 life for lack of such important scientific funding.

Nobody ever said life was fair.

4thAndLong
05-12-2003, 08:38 PM
Originally posted by Mr.Reality

Alas, but you have miscalculated yet once again. While you were reading up on Freud and Einstein's theory of relativity, and trying to rationalize how you could combine the two theories into 4thandLong's fellatio ratio, the rest of us have moved on to steady, though less sensational careers.

While the study of lickchops and meatwhistles may engross the imagination of the modern professional yardsalesman with nothing to do than shop for used shot putts and rotors; the rest of us have had to slip into the dreary everyday 9-5 life for lack of such important scientific funding.

Nobody ever said life was fair.

Seems to me like I was right.

I was actually worried that I would have nothing to insult you with, but why should I be worried? You've been getting smacked silly here. http://mywebpages.comcast.net/mrspooky/penguin.gif

But, to add on to what I was saying. Normally I couldn't insult someone with 200 posts, but someone with the intelligence of a child isn't that hard to insult. You have proven time and time again that you're an idiot.

I expected this to be much harder than it was, but your insults resemble those as of someone that has no clue.

Nope, life isn't fair. Especially when you live in a trailor and are getting kicked out.

Mr.Reality
05-12-2003, 09:06 PM
Originally posted by 4thAndLong
But, to add on to what I was saying. Normally I couldn't insult someone with 200 posts, but someone with the intelligence of a child isn't that hard to insult. You have proven time and time again that you're an idiot.
That has to be the worst, least thought out, nonsensical concession speach I have ever heard. C'mon, man! Get the lead out! You can't go on your whole life calling everybody an idiot everytime they get the best of you. It's in bad taste! It's bad sportsmanship!

At least give me your vote, man. I think I've earned it.

Dozerdog
05-12-2003, 09:46 PM
OK- Step right up!

Voting will close at 3 PM tomorrow afternoon!

BTP
05-12-2003, 10:04 PM
Originally posted by 4thAndLong


But, to add on to what I was saying. Normally I couldn't insult someone with 200 posts, but someone with the intelligence of a child isn't that hard to insult. You have proven time and time again that you're an idiot.



Post count smack? Weak **** 4thandSlong...You've hung out a Phinsheaven wayyyyy to long... You lost my vote with that crap.

in my best Simon Cowell’s (from AI) voice:

besides BOA you've have to be the worst smacker I've ever seen




:hammeru:

mybills
05-13-2003, 05:43 AM
I have to go with 4th on this one..even though Mr.R made me laugh with ...
"This is a guy who doesn’t mind the nickname halitosis cloud."
:rofl:

Ebenezer
05-13-2003, 08:44 AM
props to "fellatio ratio"...best rhyme I've heard in a while.

FischInMich
05-13-2003, 09:33 AM
Originally posted by 4thAndLong
Once again, you prove you're an idiot. 3:16:23 PM?




I think that would imply that it took you 23 seconds to masturbate. Who knows how to tell time? Who's the idiot?

Mr. Reality gets the nod here.

mchurchfie
05-13-2003, 10:52 AM
Originally posted by FischInMich



I think that would imply that it took you 23 seconds to masturbate. Who knows how to tell time? Who's the idiot?

Mr. Reality gets the nod here.

It has to beat your method of gratification...dry humping the leg of one of the derelicts passed out behind the dumpster next to your home in the projects:eek: My vote goes to Fourth:up::church:

BTP
05-13-2003, 01:40 PM
Originally posted by mybills
I have to go with 4th on this one..even though Mr.R made me laugh with ...
"This is a guy who doesn’t mind the nickname halitosis cloud."
:rofl:


come one people you dont vote for someone in a smack off because of what team he is a fan of.. :flush:

FischInMich
05-13-2003, 02:04 PM
Originally posted by mchurchfie


It has to beat your method of gratification...dry humping the leg of one of the derelicts passed out behind the dumpster next to your home in the projects:eek: My vote goes to Fourth:up::church:


Nah. If he gets his ass kicked, I'll be the first to let him know. That's guaranteed.

BTW....my home is worth about 3 times anything that is in Buffalo, the armpit of New York.

BTP
05-13-2003, 02:10 PM
Originally posted by Dozerdog
OK- Step right up!

Voting will close at 3 PM tomorrow afternoon!

what time zone we using here? :smoke:

lordofgun
05-13-2003, 02:15 PM
It's over! Mr. R moves on.

4thAndLong
05-13-2003, 02:21 PM
Good job Mr. R.

I didn't get back fast enough to vote. But it wouldn't of mattered.

Congrats.

mybills
05-13-2003, 02:27 PM
Originally posted by BTP


what time zone we using here? :smoke:

der, ah, doh...um, NY is..is...central, no mountain, no um, eastern, yeah, um, that's right! Eastern standard time! :doh:

SoFL-Cheesehead
05-13-2003, 03:09 PM
Mr. Reality was the clear winner of this round!!

The_Philster
05-13-2003, 03:40 PM
Originally posted by mybills


der, ah, doh...um, NY is..is...central, no mountain, no um, eastern, yeah, um, that's right! Eastern standard time! :doh:


Actualy, it's Eastern Daylight Time now...we are on Daylight Savings now. ;)

Mr.Reality
05-13-2003, 03:56 PM
Originally posted by 4thAndLong
Good job Mr. R.
Good game. I laughed. This was a good idea in a wicked kind of a way. It's hilarious. But I can already see I'm not gonna win too many vote offs. lol

Could it be something I said?

Dozerdog
05-13-2003, 05:51 PM
I voted for ya! I'm in it for the inhumanity to man, pure laughs on my part, and if we are lucky, a couple of people will really get offended and go postal!

:pow:


OOOPS! Sorry, Mr R.

honey
05-13-2003, 05:57 PM
:eek: POSTAL, Dozer? I'm not even IN this insult tourney! :D

Dozerdog
05-13-2003, 06:01 PM
I'll mail you an apology.....should ge there in a couple of months...;)

honey
05-13-2003, 06:05 PM
:rofl: You don't need to apologize to me! :D

Dozerdog
05-13-2003, 06:11 PM
Went right over her head....... :wave:

honey
05-13-2003, 06:18 PM
All the subtle ones do, doggie! ;) I'm very naive, you know! :D

PS - I gotcha! (translation - I understood what you were saying.) :D

Mr.Reality
05-13-2003, 06:36 PM
Originally posted by Dozerdog
Went right over her head.......
I got it, but I can only acknowledge so much in the middle of an insult tourney. I'll tell you all about it later over a couple of bottle's of Boone's. Right now I must remain in "Insult People" mode.

Dozerdog
05-13-2003, 06:39 PM
Ok Jerk- Didn't want to have you take the eye off the ball......;)

BillsOwnAll
05-13-2003, 06:41 PM
GJ Mr R. its ok 4th.

Sabre Ally
05-14-2003, 02:07 AM
dang, I didn't get to vote.