Dear Marshawn

[T-Long]

Dearest Marshawn,

I feel like each and every week I am writing to a former player; first Trent Edwards, and now you. I am writing you this letter today to bid you farewell as you head back to the west coast as you join your new team the Seattle Seahawks.

LINK

[jamze132]

Re: Dear Marshawn

Yeah, that was a little inappropriate I think. Why so harsh?

No offense, but this article didn't sound like it came from a jounalist.

[justasportsfan]

Re: Dear Marshawn

Dear Marshawn,

I still have my $20 .

[Bone]

Re: Dear Marshawn

A little over the top actually a lot...no matter which way you look at it the dude is a ****ing beast and we all know he is going to tear it up in seattle. No ones perfect there are plenty of other players who develop a bed rep and still tear it up on the field every sunday. I hate to see him go, he was way better than Fred and now this team has only gotten worse. Draft picks don't mean **** to this team because we don't know who to draft (hence the past 7-8 years)

[Beebe's Kid]

Re: Dear Marshawn

Come on, T! You're way better than this crap.

The "open letter" series is an epic fail.

It's a blog so I guess your looking for some shock value...? The takes are judgmental, and harsh. I guess that this is not journalism, and I don't know if the intent was to be. If you were looking to do some journalism, don't put these on your resume.

Sarcastic and crass is not your style, and it leave you sounding like a whining little *****.

I don't mean to be harsh, and despite what you might think I am not trying to be insulting. I am just telling you what I think. I read a lot of blogs about a lot of different thin. Yours I check out because you are a Zoner, and I can tell you that if I had come across this while browsing, I wouldn't be going back.

Look into those horrible crimes he has committed, and follow them to the end. Not one of them was nearly as bad as reported, and the law he was picked up on in California has been found Unconstitutional and repealed.

[DraftBoy]

Re: Dear Marshawn

I dont see anything wrong with it. He speaks from the voice that Ive seen many fans express on here.

[RoscoeMagic]

Re: Dear Marshawn

Yeah that was harsh. But if it's people who write for a profession, they should be more professional and not put themselves in the "fan's" shoes.

However, this is written by fans, so it's all good.

[BertSquirtgum]

Re: Dear Marshawn

i see nothing wrong with what was written.

[T-Long]

Re: Dear Marshawn

Thanks for all the feedback, both positive and negative. This is a new series this year and they want this piece to be critical of someone from the following week. Obviously, most of my pieces are usually optimisitc but this piece, along with Trent's last week, is geared more towards the "angry fan" outlook. I hope you all understand that this is supposed to be a piece voiceing the "angry fan" and I tried my best to come up with something and someone who could be angry at someone on the Bills.

Keep giving me your feedback and I'll keep working to voice it better for the majority of Bills fans.

[jamze132]

Re: Dear Marshawn

Thanks for all the feedback, both positive and negative. This is a new series this year and they want this piece to be critical of someone from the following week. Obviously, most of my pieces are usually optimisitc but this piece, along with Trent's last week, is geared more towards the "angry fan" outlook. I hope you all understand that this is supposed to be a piece voiceing the "angry fan" and I tried my best to come up with something and someone who could be angry at someone on the Bills.

Keep giving me your feedback and I'll keep working to voice it better for the majority of Bills fans.

I understand what you are trying to do but I don't think its your thing man...

[VeggieMan14]

Re: Dear Marshawn

I see nothing wrong with it and i feel like thats how most of us feel... we just wish he would have grown up a little bit and i think most of us still do and hope he has a good career elsewhere. Lets be real he was the most exciting player on this team while he was here

[trapezeus]

Re: Dear Marshawn

i'm all for marshawn succeeding in seattle so our conditional pick goes up.

[hydro]

Re: Dear Marshawn

I understand what you are trying to do but I don't think its your thing man...

Being a douche seems to be yours. Constructive criticism is one thing. You are just being ignorant.

[X-Era]

Re: Dear Marshawn

Thanks for all the feedback, both positive and negative. This is a new series this year and they want this piece to be critical of someone from the following week. Obviously, most of my pieces are usually optimisitc but this piece, along with Trent's last week, is geared more towards the "angry fan" outlook. I hope you all understand that this is supposed to be a piece voiceing the "angry fan" and I tried my best to come up with something and someone who could be angry at someone on the Bills.

Keep giving me your feedback and I'll keep working to voice it better for the majority of Bills fans.

So, I think this article is beneath you. I will give it to you straight, that was meant for a message board, not for an article on NFL.com. I think you could have done the piece much more Jerry Sullivan (cant believe I'm about to promote that douche), but sticking to the on the field facts and at a higher level, not so personal. I have no issue with highly critical, but I have a problem with a professional journalist going so personal. As sick as it is, its more acceptable to attack the owner, FO, and HC than a player. Especially one that has never actually spoken out against the Bills. If you wanted to be critical of his off the field stuff it should have been a stating the facts piece about it rather than using it as a weapon for why your glad he's gone.

Just my 2 cents.

Im editing this because Id like to suggest a few things. Maybe find a way to be that critical but stop short of the "you"s that make it personal. Change the audience from Marshawn, who wont likely read it, to the fans who would be looking for something more informative rather than person A talking to person B. I'm not saying the tone should be lessened, only that the audience should change and that the negative facts be stated as points of reference rather than as directed attacks.

[T-Long]

Re: Dear Marshawn

So, I think this article is beneath you. I will give it to you straight, that was meant for a message board, not for an article on NFL.com. I think you could have done the piece much more Jerry Sullivan (cant believe I'm about to promote that douche), but sticking to the on the field facts and at a higher level, not so personal. I have no issue with highly critical, but I have a problem with a professional journalist going so personal. As sick as it is, its more acceptable to attack the owner, FO, and HC than a player. Especially one that has never actually spoken out against the Bills. If you wanted to be critical of his off the field stuff it should have been a stating the facts piece about it rather than using it as a weapon for why your glad he's gone.

Just my 2 cents.

Im editing this because Id like to suggest a few things. Maybe find a way to be that critical but stop short of the "you"s that make it personal. Change the audience from Marshawn, who wont likely read it, to the fans who would be looking for something more informative rather than person A talking to person B. I'm not saying the tone should be lessened, only that the audience should change and that the negative facts be stated as points of reference rather than as directed attacks.

I guess you are not understanding the point of the Tuesday article. I have to speak as an angry fan to someone who screwed up or Bills fans are angry with from the past week. I do not have the journalism cap on while writing this. Don't critique it as a piece of mine personally, it's as a voice of the fan. I'm not sure why people aren't understanding the type of article it is. This is exactly what the guys at NFL.com want for my Tuesday piece. I know a lot of you have your opinions on it and that's great, but this is what they are looking for from me for Tuesday's piece. Make sense?