Kellen Winslow spanking it

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  • Mr. Miyagi
    Lecter's Little Bitch

    • Sep 2002
    • 53616

    Kellen Winslow spanking it

    The words of the report might tell this one best:
    “As she exited her vehicle, she commented to the male regarding how cold it was. As she stood near the open driver side window of the Escalade, she observed the males [sic] erect penis. She stated that she believed he was masturbating. [The woman] provided a written statement regarding her account.”
    Apparently, Kellen Winslow was in the midst of being flagged for illegal use of the hands, or hand, when he was arrested for synthetic marijuana possession last fall.


    No wonder he's dropping some many balls. His hands are full of vaseline.

  • Meathead
    Insufferable prick and perpetual crybaby
    • Jul 2002
    • 21349

    #2
    Re: Kellen Winslow spanking it

    im in boston market right now

    ok not any more
    One set of rules for all in the beloved community

    Comment

    • IlluminatusUIUC
      Registered User
      • Sep 2012
      • 8966

      #3
      Re: Kellen Winslow spanking it

      Well it's better than what a Patriots' tight end is spraying out of his SUV.


      Billszone 2013 Prediction Contest winner!

      Comment

      • Pinkerton Security
        Pinkerton's son
        • Feb 2006
        • 6003

        #4
        Re: Kellen Winslow spanking it

        bizarre. is 1 jar of vaseline REALLY not enough!?!?!
        Last edited by Pinkerton Security; 01-17-2014, 10:34 AM.

        Comment

        • GingerP
          Registered User
          • Aug 2012
          • 1717

          #5
          Re: Kellen Winslow spanking it

          Originally posted by IlluminatusUIUC View Post
          Well it's better than what a Patriots' tight end is spraying out of his SUV.
          Actually, they are both ex-Patriots TE's.

          Comment

          • stuckincincy
            Buffalo Bills Fan
            • Sep 2003
            • 15084

            #6
            Re: Kellen Winslow spanking it

            Originally posted by Meathead View Post
            im in boston market right now

            ok not any more
            All Cadillac Escalades should come standard with GPS tracking devices to keep tabs on the purchasers.
            Fiat justitia ruat caelum. Noli timere. Laus Deo.

            Comment

            • OpIv37
              Acid Douching Asswipe
              • Sep 2002
              • 101230

              #7
              Re: Kellen Winslow spanking it

              Originally posted by stuckincincy View Post
              All Cadillac Escalades should come standard with GPS tracking devices to keep tabs on the purchasers.
              They do. It's called "OnStar"
              MiKiDo Facebook
              MiKiDo Website

              Comment

              • DraftBoy
                Administrator
                • Jul 2002
                • 107452

                #8
                Re: Kellen Winslow spanking it

                So when does Boston Market introduce their newest item..

                Jerked Chicken
                COMING SOON...
                Originally posted by Dr.Lecter
                We were both drunk and Hillary did not look that bad at 2 AM, I swear!!!!!!

                Comment

                • feldspar
                  Registered User
                  • Mar 2007
                  • 13620

                  #9
                  Re: Kellen Winslow spanking it

                  Car-jacking is a serious offense.

                  Comment

                  • stuckincincy
                    Buffalo Bills Fan
                    • Sep 2003
                    • 15084

                    #10
                    Re: Kellen Winslow spanking it

                    Originally posted by OpIv37 View Post
                    They do. It's called "OnStar"
                    You are right. After years of buying GM cars, that across-the-board implementation of OnStar, as well as the government buying it, screwing the daylights out of honest shareholders, then forking over a 4K bonus to their UAW voting lackeys...I'll never ever buy a GM car again.
                    Fiat justitia ruat caelum. Noli timere. Laus Deo.

                    Comment

                    • Goobylal
                      Registered User
                      • Jan 2004
                      • 19367

                      #11
                      Re: Kellen Winslow spanking it

                      Could be another Corey McIntyre thing.

                      Comment

                      • OpIv37
                        Acid Douching Asswipe
                        • Sep 2002
                        • 101230

                        #12
                        Re: Kellen Winslow spanking it

                        Originally posted by DraftBoy View Post
                        So when does Boston Market introduce their newest item..

                        Jerked Chicken
                        It would crack me up if Boston Market was actually planning a jerk chicken promotion and had to scrap it because of this.
                        MiKiDo Facebook
                        MiKiDo Website

                        Comment

                        • gr8slayer
                          Registered User
                          • Feb 2005
                          • 20796

                          #13
                          Re: Kellen Winslow spanking it

                          This story hurts my brain.

                          Comment

                          • Meathead
                            Insufferable prick and perpetual crybaby
                            • Jul 2002
                            • 21349

                            #14
                            Re: Kellen Winslow spanking it

                            Originally posted by feldspar View Post
                            Car-jacking is a serious offense.
                            it was a pump fake
                            One set of rules for all in the beloved community

                            Comment

                            • Mace
                              Haha...yeah you think so ?
                              • Mar 2013
                              • 20315

                              #15
                              Re: Kellen Winslow spanking it

                              At Target though ? The dude makes money, big money....

                              "ooh, dowdy women shopping for bargains, soooooo hot"

                              And no, I am not saying all women that shop at Target are dowdy, but you sort of get a more real world bunch of people that your average NFL player can probably afford to meet handily by saying "Hi, I am an NFL player, may I do things to myself in your presence while paying you more than your income for a couple years ? I want you to wiggle in those stretch pants baby"...

                              Assuming he was looking at girls. Probably makes more sense if he wasn't in which case he has more compelling issues, sitting in a cadillac at Target wacking off with vaseline when he can probably afford his vices quietly if they aren't federal offenses.

                              Comment

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