IlluminatusUIUC's 'McShay wishes he thought of it first' mock draft 2015

[IlluminatusUIUC]

Here's my mock draft for the year. It's done in a bit of haste this year, with all the craziness in the FA period I honestly haven't followed the draft as much as in previous seasons. So as always, I choose to distract people from my ignorance with pretty girls.

This is what I would do with each pick, not a prediction of what they'll do. Original pickholder gets the picture.

Thanks to Merk and adamarc for their big board at http://www.profootballwarroom.com/rankings.htm

1. Tampa Bay Buccaneers - Leonard Williams - DT USC

Since I'm the GM here, I'm not sold on Winston as the #1 overall pick. So many discipline red flags and so many games where he seemed to sleepwalk through the first half worry me. Lock down the interior DL with Williams, McCoy, and Melton to try to make that Tampa 2 work again.

http://i.imgur.com/t0FoZqX.jpg

2. Tennessee Titans - Jameis Winston - QB FSU

Here it makes more sense, since Tennessee is farther away from Winston's idiot buddies, and Whisenhut has a much better track record with big-armed pocket passers.

http://i.imgur.com/Gpvdkzj.jpg

3. Jacksonville Jaguars - Trade to New York Jets - Marcus Mariota - QB ORE[/B}

With Mariota falling to three, New York tries to stay ahead of San Diego and trades up for the pick to claim Mariota. Chan Gailey is willing to design an offense around a mobile QB, and Mariota would be the most talent he's had to work with since Aikman 20 years ago.

http://i.imgur.com/D82RgiF.jpg

4. Oakland Raiders - [B]Amari Cooper - WR BAMA

I'm higher on Crabtree than most, but he's clearly a #2 guy and the rest of their WR corps is pretty dismal.

http://i.imgur.com/fljqOA5.jpg

5. Washington Redskins - Dante Fowler - EDGE UF

Washington's needs clearly lie on Defense, but the Knighton signing (secretly one of the best in FA) fills their biggest hole. When your strong safety is tied for 3rd on the team in sacks, you have a pass rush problem.

http://i.imgur.com/uayZ2Zu.jpg

6. New York Jets - Trade to Jacksonville Jaguars - Kevin White WR WVU

Jacksonville has so many holes I don't know where to start really. Julius Thomas is great but their offense still needs punch get out of the basement.

http://i.imgur.com/EjXwpkY.jpg

7. Chicago Bears - Devante Parker - WR LOUIS

The Bears did bring in a lot of FA talent to try to improve their defense, and I agree with many saying that is still a concern. However, their biggest loss IMO was Marshall so I'm going to fill that hole first.

http://i.imgur.com/XBUC5mx.jpg

8. Atlanta Falcons - Vic Beasley - EDGE CLEM

Leading pass rusher has 4.5 sacks. That really should say it all.

http://i.imgur.com/y3vFt2p.jpg

[IlluminatusUIUC]

9. New York Giants - Brandon Scherff - OG IOWA

I think you can never really over-invest in the offensive line (I say that every year), and when you have a franchise QB entering his mid 30s then it becomes doubly important to keep his pockets clean.

http://i.imgur.com/bRk6Vv3.jpg

10. St. Louis Rams - Ereck Flowers - OT FSU

The Rams are quietly building a beast team. I can't wait to see that defensive line, which had a bad year but on paper is one of the deepest and strongest in history. The Rams offensive line picks though... not good.

http://i.imgur.com/sVVsflW.jpg

11. Minnesota Vikings - Malcolm Brown - DT TEXAS

I wasn't really sure where to go with the Vikings pick. PFWR had them taking a corner, their biggest need is probably a left tackle, but they've spend firsts on both of those very recently. Whenever I'm in doubt in the first I just grab the best lineman available.

http://i.imgur.com/Wo6wp6q.jpg

12. Cleveland Browns - Trae Waynes - CB MSU

I think Tramon Williams is on the back slope of his career, and as we saw personally, Pettine's defense can be exploited if one of the DBs is a liability in coverage.

http://i.imgur.com/UUs48id.jpg

13. New Orleans Saints - Randy Gregory - EDGE NU

New Orleans is forced to overhaul their defense on the fly without any money because of the dead cap they are eating for the Graham and Grubbs trades. I figure an edge rusher opposite Galette and Jordan should help the earliest.

http://i.imgur.com/4Fbhssk.jpg

14. Miami Dolphins - Cameron Erving - OG FSU

Miami made their big splash already on defense, so I will shore up their OL. Our DL has been the stuff of Tannehill's nightmares.

http://i.imgur.com/BfAHHCH.jpg

15. San Francisco 49ers - Eddie Goldman - DT FSU

Where do you even start with this team? Losing two all pro defenders, a legit DROTY candidate, your head coach, and your dignity all in the same offseason? Since they can't draft a coach, and there are no legit ILB prospects around this spot, I'll try replacing Smith first.

http://i.imgur.com/SGrSdMr.jpg

16. Houston Texans - Trade to San Diego Chargers - Andrus Peat OT STAN

See below

http://i.imgur.com/xkJ8waL.jpg

[IlluminatusUIUC]

17. San Diego Chargers - Todd Gurley - RB UGA

Facing the prospect of losing Rivers for nothing, I think San Diego goes back to the well to attempt the same trick they pulled in 2001. By dealing Rivers to Houston for their 1st, 2nd, and a conditional 2016 pick, they attempt to rebuild around a halfback, a strong OL, and a 2nd round QB. I'm not doing the 2nd round, but I would mock Grayson to them if I was. I usually don't take halfbacks in the first, but San Diego is in a unique position.

Meanwhile, Houston is a team that feels very close to something. I know they signed Hoyer but come on. You can't sell me on a team QB'd by Hoyer beating Indianapolis. I also think Houston is a town where Rivers would feel comfortable playing out his career.

http://i.imgur.com/vY7LPMb.jpg

18. Kansas City Chiefs - Nelson Agholor - WR USC

A bit of a reach here, but Kansas City went more than a calendar year without a TD pass to a wide receiver, then lost their best wide receiver in FA.

http://i.imgur.com/VEaR42f.jpg

19. Cleveland Browns (from Buffalo) - Jaelen Strong - WR ASU

Cleveland has serious needs at QB, which is why they were rumored to be interested in trading up for Mariota. But this is early to be taking one of them since they have so many other needs on the offense. I'll try to replace Gordon here, since it seems unlikely they will re-sign him. He'll be the #2 this year behind Bowe.

http://i.imgur.com/qj6OfAr.jpg

20. Philadelphia Eagles - Erik Armstead - EDGE ORE

I wrote this mock on Wednesday afternoon, which means by the time I posted it the Eagles could have made three more trades and moved the franchise to Los Angeles. Who the hell can keep up? Just take the best Oregon player on the board and move on.

http://i.imgur.com/VMSmr1s.jpg

21. Cincinnati Bengals - Bud Dupree - EDGE UK

The Bengals edge rusher situation was atrocious last year, and even though they brought back Michael Johnson, I like to double down on these problems sometimes when the weakness is THAT severe.

http://i.imgur.com/5pKmhsM.jpg

22. Pittsburgh Steelers - Marcus Peters - CB WASH

Time conquers all men, and it has finally caught up with the Steelers secondary. After losing Polamalu and Taylor in the same offseason, it's time to inject some more young blood into the defensive backfield.

http://i.imgur.com/EBxUPDW.jpg

23. Detroit Lions - Danny Shelton - DT WASH

Getting the interior DL gutted like that was the fastest I've ever seen a team strength turn into a gaping team weakness.

http://i.imgur.com/oX4Vyv0.jpg

24. Arizona Cardinals - Melvin Gordon - RB WISC

I have two rules I like to follow: Don't take halfbacks in the first unless its the last piece you need, and don't take Wisconsin halfbacks. I think the Cardinals fit the former and Gordon defies the latter.

http://i.imgur.com/9YRjxLG.jpg

[IlluminatusUIUC]

25. Carolina Panthers - Shane Ray - DE MIZZOU

With Shane Ray being an idiot, it drops his stock to the point where the Panthers can get him while simultaneously being LESS of an idiot then the guy he replaced! Win win!

http://i.imgur.com/Uxm59Ia.jpg

26. Baltimore Ravens - Devin Smith - WR OSU

Baltimore is a Super Bowl caliber team with a massive hole at the wideout position. A corner back makes sense here, but I still think Flacco's deep ball is their best offensive weapon and losing Torrey Smith undermines that badly.

http://i.imgur.com/bNc0nSM.jpg
As a side note, while "researching" I found a few pictures of women in Ravens jerseys posing with painted on black eyes. What in the actual ****?

27. Dallas Cowboys - Jaime Collins - CB LSU

Some are still talking about this pick heading to Minnesota for Peterson, but I can't possibly see how that works financially. That said, Dallas' defense is the weak link here.

http://i.imgur.com/9vHGpaW.jpg

28. Denver Broncos - Jordan Phillips - DT OU

Well it's the last ride for old man Manning. Overall this team is strong on offense and surprisingly young despite the FA splashes they've made. I think Knighton is their biggest loss and so I try to fill it here.

http://i.imgur.com/sJmlk95.jpg

29. Indianapolis Colts - Landon Collins - SS BAMA

LaRon Landry has taken his roid act on the road, and Indy has been completely unable to figure out the Patriots. Collins should, in theory, help them stop the run and maybe, just maybe, he could cover their offensive tackle when the guy goes out on a pass route.

http://i.imgur.com/yAo6t2X.jpg

30. Green Bay Packers - Eric Kendricks - ILB UCLA

The overdrafting of AJ Hawk forced him onto the field for years longer than he deserved, and the Packers' weakness at ILB saw them move Matthews inside on some plays to try to cover for it. Matthews is not totally wasted in that role, but it does diminish him, so put a real ILB back there for support.

http://i.imgur.com/ThXgd5r.jpg

31. New Orleans Saints (from Seattle) - AJ Cann - OG SCAR

With a QB like Brees, the interior OL play is magnified, and since they decided to inexplicably load up on halfback contracts this year, it's doubly so.

http://i.imgur.com/JNr8Xui.jpg

32. New England Patriots - Kevin Johnson - CB WAKE

New England, as always, comes into the draft looking to trade down. This year, however, I don't really see the market for that so I see them standing pat and doing Belichick's second favorite thing: taking a DB in the 30-40 range.

http://i.imgur.com/t91n8Lw.jpg

[cookie G]

There's some distracting scribbling between the photos...

think you can clean it up a bit?

[better days]

Love the girls, but if the Bucs don't draft a QB at #1, they will trade that pick.

[IlluminatusUIUC]

Love the girls, but if the Bucs don't draft a QB at #1, they will trade that pick.

I can see that, but the only plausible trade up to #1 I could see came from the Jets. And I wouldn't do it if I was the Jets, so I dunno. Tampa is kinda stuck taking Winston in real life.

[SpikedLemonade]

"Jacksonville has so many holes I don't know where to start really."

That is how I feel about her as well.

Plus she is so top heavy I wonder how the woman can stand up without falling forward.

[better days]

I can see that, but the only plausible trade up to #1 I could see came from the Jets. And I wouldn't do it if I was the Jets, so I dunno. Tampa is kinda stuck taking Winston in real life.

In real life, if the Chargers want to trade Rivers, I would like to see them trade him to the Bucs, not the Titans.

And if the Bucs aren't sold on a QB in the draft, why not trade with them instead of the Titans?

[Bill Cody]

with that pick the Steelers look strong up front

[IlluminatusUIUC]

In real life, if the Chargers want to trade Rivers, I would like to see them trade him to the Bucs, not the Titans.

And if the Bucs aren't sold on a QB in the draft, why not trade with them instead of the Titans?

IMO Tampa isn't close enough that Rivers puts them over the top. And speculating about what sort of situation Rivers wants to walk into, I don't know that he re-signs with Tampa.

[Topas]

I think the Packers got a steal at 30

[don137]

Living Charlotte I can guarantee after the whole Hardy ordeal the Panthers will not draft anyone with a questionable background. Ray will never be drafted by Panthers.

[GvilleBills]

Best mock ever...

[Meathead]

the philly and baltimore chicks look like they will literally kick your ass. over nuthin.

[Meathead]

which when u think about it feels strangely right

it also appears painted on has become the international standard for clothed now. interesting

[Topas]

Love your text for the Texans: "see below"
I guess that sums it up for the whole mock :D

[yordad]

Great thread.... and I didnt read any of it.