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Gunzlingr
07-23-2003, 12:54 AM
LAKE BUENA VISTA - John Howell always knew his lot in life, whether it was his daily chores growing up on a 60,000-acre cattle ranch in Mullen, Neb., or his role as a husband and father of two.

Or especially his job as the Bucs' backup strong safety.

But over a period of time culminating with last year's 10-day absence from training camp, Howell's identity became muddled.

``All my life, since I was a little kid, I've known where I was going, what I was going to do and how I was going to get there,'' Howell said. ``Then all of sudden, I didn't know anymore.

``I was scared.''

While the majority of the Bucs organization thought family problems were the reason for Howell's departure from camp, some knew it was something more serious clinical depression.

more (http://bucs.tbo.com/bucs/MGAXE2SAFID.html)