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ROUND 1: OpIv37 vs. buffalosabres04
Round 1 will be freestyle. Do whatever the heck you want. Just make sure it's funny and insulting. And please refer to the rules in the sticky thread if you have any questions.
Each contestant will take turns insulting each other. This round will consist of 6 turns each.
buffalosabres04 will go first.
if OpIv37 opened his own museum it would only have the broken condom that led to his birth.
You spend all day having your head surgically removed from your ass and that's the best you can come up with? Broken condom jokes stopped being funny around 1995, which coincidentally is the same year you bought the faded, sweat-stained Metallica concert t-shirt that you wear every single day. Your life is so boring that you reminisce by looking at the food stains on that smelly-ass shirt and enjoying memories of the extra value meals that cost your entire paycheck.
Try not to take so long with your next response, chump- oh wait, it's Valentine's Day so I'm sure you'll be home by yourself watching Fresh Prince of Bel-Air re-runs and having sexual fantasies about Carlton.
Since your last memory in the real world was getting your flock of seagulls haircut, i'll bring you up to speed. Gay jokes aren't funny anymore unless of course it involves your mother and a jar of peanut butter. Then when your mom is using the peanut butter then u can go into your garage and dig out your red lil wagon and play police officer with your stuffed monkey and tea set.
did you mean to type those words in that order, or is that just the random pattern that occurred when you bent your inflatable date over the keyboard? I'm getting the feeling you're the kind of "special" child who has to wear a bike helmet even when you're not riding a bike. Please, tell me a funny gay joke that involves my mother and a jar of peanut butter. I'm dying to see your feeble mind attempt to climb out of the hole you just dug yourself into.
Maybe I shouldn't be so hard on you- I'm sure you're depressed about the loss of the hockey season. Don't feel bad- it gives you even more time to work on your other hobby that involves playing with your stick (although that stick isn't even as long as a hockey stick is wide).
Keep running with scissors- maybe you'll fall on them and do the rest of us a huge favor.
you want the gay joke? your other gets it from behind from a buffalo while shes eating peanut butter. the gay part is your the one eating the peanut butter getting a greeting from billy buffalo. not only is billy alone but he brought buster bison along with him so when he finishes your just getting started. enjoy the peanut butter.
Is there an insult in there somewhere? You could put a four year old in front of the computer and tell him to mash the keyboard with his palm- it would produce better insults by random chance than this BS you're typing. Then again, I guess I shouldn't expect much from the intellectual genius who put a year in his username- hey ****-for-brains, did it ever occur to you that the year would eventually END and then you'd look like a JACKASS for having "04" in your name?
of course, given the lack of branches in your family tree, it's a miracle that you can even walk upright, let alone speak or type. In your family, reunions and orgies are the same thing. At least weddings are simplified- since everyone's related to the groom AND the bride, they just fill both sides of the church evenly.
The year is for the year of my signup nuttickler. At least my name makes sense instead of you taking a dump on your keyboard which brought out yours. I have a family tree unlike your family who can't afford a family weed. your so poor you can't even afford food stamps. so sackjuggler, im guessing you couldnt afford a church for your marriages either. you can always have a procession in your cardboard box with some hookers as bridesmaids and sewer rats as ringbearers.
sorry- I could barely follow your post without my "white-trash-to-English" dictionary. This has been more challenging than I thought, because every time I read your responses, it takes forever to find the insult buried in the incoherent gibberish. Family weed? That doesn't even make sense. And if there was such a thing as "family weed", your dumb ass would roll it up and try to smoke it. By the way, your desperation is showing through your mature and witty use of scatological humor (I'll save you the trouble of looking it up- that means "poop jokes").
As far as my username, well I hate to be the one to break it to you, but there was music made BEFORE 1997, and some of it was GOOD. But, you listen to Insane Clown Posse so I don't expect you to know anything about GOOD music. I suppose I can understand why you listen to ICP- for people as butt-ugly as you are, jackasses who always find a way to hide their faces in public make excellent role models.
Now get off the dial up connection (that's all your poor ass can afford) so your mom can buy more decorations for the double-wide trailer off of QVC. One Velvet Elvis is never enough!
Your right music was made before 1997 like good metal like metallica and megadeth but you steer clear of anything heterosexual(straight). admit it, you have posters of prince and madonna and new kids on the block right above your bed.
You can't find my insults? i'll make it easier for you. "pull you nuts out of your dogs pooper and screw them back onto yourself so you can act your age not the number of sisters you impregnated."
was that easier fartnugget?
Well, at first I was impressed that you not only spelled "heterosexual" properly, but also used it correctly. But, then you demonstrated your true intelligence with the "fartknocker" joke. Did you steal that from one of the 5 year olds you try to molest by luring them into your '86 Camaro with last year's leftover Easter candy?
I'm sorry, I guess I didn't realize that heterosexual music and trailer trash noise pollution were the same thing. You know you listen to that crap while you make speed in the shower stall of your trailer, which you then sell at the local junior high school while trying to score with 13-year-olds. I bet that sexy mullet flowing out the window of your Camaro brings in the underage white trash poontang like crazy.
And if your uncle didn't anally rape you when you were six, I bet you wouldn't be so intent on proving to the world just how heterosexual you are.
well this is my last chance at insulting you for round 1.
the only way you know about my trailer and '86 camaro are because you're the one who walks by everyday and dumbly stares at them while reaching down your pants and drooling. you provide me with the ingredients to make speed so i can lure children into your 72 pinto. while ur driving your car to your house with your new pre-school prostitute, you realize she's your daughter. then you just shrugs your shoulders and reach down your pants. When the cops come to check on you they take you away in steel wristbands and take you to your new house with a new room and your new girlfriend named Sally who has a mustache and who licks his lips when u bend over to pick up the soap. At this point you probably don't drop the soap anymore much less you throw it down so you can have some fun before beddy-bye with Sally. While falling asleep you feel a tingling sensation in your @$$ by now your used to it. you just smile and close your eyes while Sally does his work.
Remember the moral of the story: don't beat it to trailers and you wont get stuck by Sally.
Wow, mullet-boy, you really stepped it up for your last post in this round. Be careful with that prison-rape joke- it's an antique. And the child molestation joke didn't sound anything like the child molestation joke in my last post. The whole thing sounds more like your sexual fantasy than an insult. If something similar ever happened to you, you'd be sending the story to a different website, only it would start with "Dear Penthouse, I never thought it would happen to me, but...."
I think I hear your mommy calling you for dinner. She's making your favorite white-trash meal: generic Kool Aid and "wish sandwiches". That's where your poor ass eats two slices of Wonder bread and wishes you could afford some meat to go between them. and please, don't wrap your two-inch schlong in the bread then ask your sister if she wants to eat a "pig in a blanket". Every time you do that, she *****es about it the whole time I'm nailing her and it really kills the mood.
Now take your outdated user name and piss off, you little *****. Your ride's here :shortbus:
Good job! Voting closes at noon ET wednesday!
no contest
Not even a doubt after 1 post per contestant. The childish names from 04 cost him this competition.
I'm not exactly sure what is being said here. Someone please explain.Quote:
Originally Posted by buffalosabres04
I think someone is eating Peanut Butter while doing something with a buffalo and bison, I think :scratch:Quote:
Originally Posted by RedEyE