I second.Quote:
Originally posted by RedEyE
:rofl:
I'd like to nominate this thread into the BFZ HOF. I'm laughing so hard my stomach hurts.
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I second.Quote:
Originally posted by RedEyE
:rofl:
I'd like to nominate this thread into the BFZ HOF. I'm laughing so hard my stomach hurts.
She single?Quote:
Originally posted by mybills
Hey BOA, I just had my 11th grade daughter read this. Here's what she had to say.
1. It's too repetitive, and you have at least 10 sentences that start with the word 'smoking'.
2. Grammar & spelling are part of EVERY rubric.
3. You combined facts & opinions, where the latter should only be in your argument.
4. Agree's that it'll only get you a low B or C grade.
Maybe she can hook up with BOA- :up:
OK this is a Fragment
Quote:
Its hurts your pets and the wild life around you
NOT! :plunge: :snicker:
Have you ever heard of a thesaurus?
No it is not a Dinosaur :snicker:
OK please don't kill me guys. I have never been a very good writer but I can BS with the best of them :snicker:
BOA I have rewritten the opening paragraph so you can see what a Thesaurus can do for you. I won't promise the grammar is perfect but I think this flows much better and is less repetitive.
Smoking cigarettes has been proven to be detrimental to your health and the health of others. It is this writer’s opinion that it should be illegal throughout the world. It has been confirmed to cause cancer in a majority of people that smoke. Smokers not only hurt themselves, some studies have shown that it may cause asthma and other respiratory problems in children and adults. Cigarette butts littered all over the side of the road can cause damage to wildlife and the environment as well.
Quote:
Originally posted by Voltron
OK please don't kill me guys. I have never been a very good writer but I can BS with the best of them :snicker:
BOA I have rewritten the opening paragraph so you can see what a Thesaurus can do for you. I won't promise the grammar is perfect but I think this flows much better and is less repetitive.
Smoking cigarettes has been proven to be detrimental to your health and the health of others. It is this writer’s opinion that it should be illegal throughout the world. It has been confirmed to cause cancer in a majority of people that smoke. Smokers not only hurt themselves, some studies have shown that it may cause asthma and other respiratory problems in children and adults. Cigarette butts littered all over the side of the road can cause damage to wildlife and the environment as well.
There is NO way she'll buy that he wrote that.
What BOA Reads:Quote:
Originally posted by mybills
Hey BOA, I just had my 11th grade daughter read this. Here's what she had to say.
1. It's too repetitive, and you have at least 10 sentences that start with the word 'smoking'.
2. Grammar & spelling are part of EVERY rubric.
3. You combined facts & opinions, where the latter should only be in your argument.
4. Agree's that it'll only get you a low B or C grade.
blah, blah, blah hmmmmm 11th grade... I wonder of she's hot. blah, blah, blah
I know but I wanted to show him what a Thesaurus can do for you :DQuote:
Originally posted by yledust
There is NO way she'll buy that he wrote that.
Hell I don't care if he copies it because he will have a decent opening paragraph and the rest will look like crap so his teacher will know he didn't do his own work. :idunno:
Even if you were to fix up the entire essay, the teacher would still know that BOA didn't write it because it wouldn't resemble anything that he has ever written in his life.
F
Wanna explain why?Quote:
Originally posted by lordofgun
F
I liked it better before you screwed it up. :mad:Quote:
Originally posted by billsfanone
Wanna explain why?
She's way too lenient.Quote:
Originally posted by BillsOwnAll
my teacher is a 27 year old women with a fro!. she wont spit on me she doesnt even yell EVER.
It's NOT supposed to be funny!Quote:
Originally posted by lordofgun
I liked it better before you screwed it up. :mad:
I still liked it better before. If I was a teacher, I'd give him a B just for making me laugh so hard.Quote:
Originally posted by billsfanone
It's NOT supposed to be funny!
But if he made me pee my pants from laughing so hard, I might drop it to a C.
I see your point. I'm just trying to help the kid out so he isn't the laughing stock of the entire 10th grade. So in the secret teacher meetings, the teacher doesn't whip out the paper and share it with the rest of the faculty so they can laugh their butts off about how terrible it is. I’m not that mean to sit back and allow him to be ridiculed. To be mocked at private parties. Where is your compassion LOG?Quote:
Originally posted by lordofgun
I still liked it better before. If I was a teacher, I'd give him a B just for making me laugh so hard.
But if he made me pee my pants from laughing so hard, I might drop it to a C.
That's a sentence fragment, sir.Quote:
Originally posted by billsfanone
To be mocked at private parties.
F
Yeah, yeah, yeah.Quote:
Originally posted by lordofgun
That's a sentence fragment, sir.
F
I love you.Quote:
Originally posted by billsfanone
Yeah, yeah, yeah.