So here you go:
My favorite parts:
NO WAY SIXTY DOORS MY GOD HOW CAN ONE MAN LIGHTLY TAP ON THAT MANY DOORS HE MUST BE SOME KIND OF GODTony:1) Our new logo looks like a Chinese knockoff version of the original. Makes the Marlins logo look cool, which I thought was impossible.4) Coaxing Don Shula and Marino out of retirement has actually crossed the minds of fans. As an actual ****ing option.
2) We're more famous for locker room discrimination, shenanigans, and roid raged bullies than actual football.
3) Our head coach looks like he's the general manager of the local bowling alley.Last time I went to Miami, I got blackout drunk, groped my friend's mom, non-bigoted up naked on the patio with all my **** covered in gallons of vomit. That gives me less shame than being a Dolphins fan.