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Thread: Morning Dumps

  1. #1
    Dumber than the average blonde :-) Blondie's Avatar
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    Morning Dumps

    Every morning I wake up, and head to the litter box to clean out the cat **** before the dogs eat it.

    I then brew a pot of coffee for coastal and I ... About 30 mins later I head the toilet to fill er' up!!

    Takes me about 2 mins to preform my dump ...

    We have a thread about daily weather and workouts, clearly dumps were next...

    Everyday let's post our morning or daily dump stories.

    My Mistake ~~ Sparty

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    Registered User jamze132's Avatar
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    Re: Morning Dumps

    I read the peanut gallery posts while dropping little Illumi's off.

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    Zone's most cruel & vile 2016 Mace's Avatar
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    Re: Morning Dumps

    I could be doing anything. That's why I bought the adult diapers. I can't be bothered with toilet time. Change 'em when I feel like it, hose myself off with the kitchen sink sprayer, put on a fresh one, go out and throw the old one at an immigrant, and keep going.
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    Acid Douching Asswipe OpIv37's Avatar
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    Re: Morning Dumps

    The coffee is definitely my driver, but I make sure never to do it til I get to work. I'm not gonna shot on my own time when I can be getting paid to do it.

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    Blondie (07-13-2016),chernobylwraiths (07-14-2016),DraftBoy (07-14-2016),Generalissimus Gibby (07-13-2016),jamze132 (07-13-2016)

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    Re: Morning Dumps

    I wake up at 5 am.
    I run over to Spikelemonaide bushes and dump in them.
    All good to go.
    Draft a franchise QB that X-Era would be proud to put in his user name for the next 13 years.

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    Legendary Zoner coastal's Avatar
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    Re: Morning Dumps

    The older I get the less clean they come out

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    Dumber than the average blonde :-) Blondie's Avatar
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    Re: Morning Dumps

    Quote Originally Posted by OpIv37 View Post
    The coffee is definitely my driver, but I make sure never to do it til I get to work. I'm not gonna shot on my own time when I can be getting paid to do it.
    Hahahahahaha!!! Seriously, you KNOW people do this!!!

    There is ALWAYS that one guy who shows up, clocks in, then "heads" to get coffee, to "show up" 15-20mins later!!!

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    Registered User jamze132's Avatar
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    Re: Morning Dumps

    The older I get, the more frequent they come. My sphincter does kegel's so I don't **** myself while walking around Home Depot.

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    Re: Morning Dumps

    Quote Originally Posted by Mace View Post
    I could be doing anything. That's why I bought the adult diapers. I can't be bothered with toilet time. Change 'em when I feel like it, hose myself off with the kitchen sink sprayer, put on a fresh one, go out and throw the old one at an immigrant, and keep going.
    I knew it, I knew it, I knew it, YOU ACTUALLY WERE PROJECTING. Good Lord, what a vile creature.

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    Zone's most cruel & vile 2016 Mace's Avatar
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    Re: Morning Dumps

    Quote Originally Posted by MST3KBillsfan View Post
    I knew it, I knew it, I knew it, YOU ACTUALLY WERE PROJECTING. Good Lord, what a vile creature.
    Sure I was. I have to go check my jar of mayo.

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    Acid Douching Asswipe OpIv37's Avatar
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    Re: Morning Dumps

    Quote Originally Posted by Blondie View Post
    Hahahahahaha!!! Seriously, you KNOW people do this!!!

    There is ALWAYS that one guy who shows up, clocks in, then "heads" to get coffee, to "show up" 15-20mins later!!!
    I drink the coffee on my drive, 20-30 minutes, get to work, check my email to see if there is anything urgent, then it's off to the bathroom.

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    Mace (07-13-2016)

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    Zone's most cruel & vile 2016 Mace's Avatar
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    Re: Morning Dumps

    Quote Originally Posted by OpIv37 View Post
    I drink the coffee on my drive, 20-30 minutes, get to work, check my email to see if there is anything urgent, then it's off to the bathroom.
    I knew people like that. They varied it though. Lazy in the AM, morning dump, want extra time on lunch because no one is going to follow you there, afternoon dump, want extra time end of shift, evening dump. Crisis situation ? Oh they had to go. Think most of them went at home really though. I never smelled anything in the bathrooms when I trapped them (I was supervisory or managing) there because I would be standing by the door to smoke an illegal cigarette. What were they going to do, turn me in ? Mostly they flushed alot and kept clearing their throats so I'd know someone was in a stall, hoping the door would close again and they wouldn't smell my cigarettes or hear me humming current pop tunes while I watched their feet get twitchy.

    I didn't care, maybe next time they'd be smart enough to use the other bathroom than the one I intended to smoke in.

  23. #13
    Registered User bleve's Avatar
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    Re: Morning Dumps

    Quote Originally Posted by Blondie View Post
    Every morning I wake up, and head to the litter box to clean out the cat **** before the dogs eat it.

    I then brew a pot of coffee for coastal and I ... About 30 mins later I head the toilet to fill er' up!!

    Takes me about 2 mins to preform my dump ...

    We have a thread about daily weather and workouts, clearly dumps were next...

    Everyday let's post our morning or daily dump stories.

    Grammatically, it's "coastal and me"
    "You can't be a real country unless you have beer and an airline - it helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need beer."
    ~ Frank Zappa

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  25. #14
    RABBI Haile SpikedLemonade's Avatar
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    Re: Morning Dumps

    Quote Originally Posted by coastal View Post
    The older I get the less clean they come out
    That is because you have things being shoved in.

  26. #15
    Dumber than the average blonde :-) Blondie's Avatar
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    Re: Morning Dumps

    Quote Originally Posted by bleve View Post
    Grammatically, it's "coastal and me"
    There is always the guy who has to throw his dung at others as they walk by

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    Haile SpikedLemonade (07-14-2016)

  28. #16
    Well, lookie here... YardRat's Avatar
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    Re: Morning Dumps

    Quote Originally Posted by jamze132 View Post
    The older I get, the more frequent they come. My sphincter does kegel's so I don't **** myself while walking around Home Depot.
    Would should you be any different than everybody else walking around in there?
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  29. #17
    Zamboni Driver rbochan's Avatar
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    Re: Morning Dumps

    Quote Originally Posted by Blondie View Post
    Every morning I wake up, and head to the litter box to clean out the cat **** before the dogs eat it...
    Let the dogs at it and save yourself the hassle.
    ...Rob

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    it's Don't Tread On Me.

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  31. #18
    Legendary Zoner coastal's Avatar
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    Re: Morning Dumps

    Three wipes for clean paper this AM.

    not bad.

  32. #19
    Pretty cool for a Fin Fan. Jaydog57's Avatar
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    Re: Morning Dumps

    Quote Originally Posted by rbochan View Post
    Let the dogs at it and save yourself the hassle.
    Yep. My mom doesn't have to buy kitty litter for her cat's litter box very often, because the dog always cleans it out before she can. Dogs are like sharks, they'll eat anything.
    "There ought to be a room in every house to swear in. It's dangerous to have to repress an emotion like that." - Mark Twain

  33. #20
    Dumber than the average blonde :-) Blondie's Avatar
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    Re: Morning Dumps

    It's so gross... We have another cat that is an indoor/outdoor cat. He always does his business outside.. Any who, when we let the dogs out back they go biscuit hunting so they can eat his ****.. Hahahahaha ...

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