Miami Week-Joke Thread [Archive] - BillsZone.com

Bufftp

09-09-2010, 12:59 PM

Should be easy- they are the Dolphelons after all.

I'll start it off,
What has 100,000 legs and 29 teeth?

answer: A Miami Dolphelon home game.

OpIv37

09-09-2010, 01:04 PM

come on, Ted, you screwed it up already by giving them an even number of legs. It's FL- you know there are going to be several people missing legs due to alligator-related mishaps.

Also, 100,000 legs? That's a minimum of 50,000 people (probably more since many are missing legs). When was the last time that many people actually showed up for a Dolphins game?

DolfanTom

09-09-2010, 01:11 PM

Wow, anyone even associated w/ anything from Buffalo making jokes about missing teeth is the definition if irony!! :headscrat

The last buffalo fan

09-09-2010, 01:12 PM

You just made mybills' day! :1:

Mr. Miyagi

09-09-2010, 01:17 PM

Wow, anyone even associated w/ anything from Buffalo making jokes about missing teeth is the definition if irony!! :headscrat
Florida is the trailer park of the country.

OpIv37

09-09-2010, 01:17 PM

Wow, anyone even associated w/ anything from Buffalo making jokes about missing teeth is the definition if irony!! :headscrat

Huh? You're saying Buffalo is more known for having missing teeth than a Southern state like Florida? That's just absurd.

Now, if you said people from Buffalo were fat from eating too many chicken wings, or pasty white from never being exposed to the sun, or had testicular cancer from living too close to Love Canal, then you might be onto something. But their teeth are fine.

Bufftp

09-09-2010, 01:18 PM

Wow, anyone even associated w/ anything from Buffalo making jokes about missing teeth is the definition if irony!! :headscrat
sorry little dolfelon, in the North we still have our teeth, brains and nasal septum's.

OpIv37

09-09-2010, 01:18 PM

Florida is the trailer park of the country.

And according to Homer Simpson, it's also America's wang.

Mr. Miyagi

09-09-2010, 01:19 PM

And according to Homer Simpson, it's also America's wang.
Ed Wang?

DolfanTom

09-09-2010, 01:24 PM

sorry little dolfelon, in the North we still have our teeth, brains and nasal septum's.

I live in Saratoga.

I went to college in Western New York, I've seen the toothlessness firsthand ;-)

DolfanTom

09-09-2010, 01:25 PM

Huh? You're saying Buffalo is more known for having missing teeth than a Southern state like Florida? That's just absurd.

Now, if you said people from Buffalo were fat from eating too many chicken wings, or pasty white from never being exposed to the sun, or had testicular cancer from living too close to Love Canal, then you might be onto something. But their teeth are fine.

SoFla isn't! That's where the Dolphins are from, and what I've seen. I can't make any such assumptions about the rest of the state.

DolfanTom

09-09-2010, 01:26 PM

Now, if you said people from Buffalo were fat from eating too many chicken wings, or pasty white from never being exposed to the sun, or had testicular cancer from living too close to Love Canal, then you might be onto something. But their teeth are fine.

Alright, point taken!! :nod:

justasportsfan

09-09-2010, 02:18 PM

I live in Saratoga.

I went to college in Western New York, I've seen the toothlessness firsthand ;-)
have you ever been to Davie, Fl ? They make Joe Dirt look like a GQ model.

SabreEleven

09-09-2010, 02:21 PM

Then you throw in all the old people, dentures don't count as teeth.

BertSquirtgum

09-09-2010, 02:21 PM

there are definitely a lot of slack jawed yokels in florida. don't kid yourself.

Dolphan:

http://wiw.org/~jess/wp-content/uploads/2007/07/cletus.gif

SabreEleven

09-09-2010, 02:22 PM

Wow, anyone even associated w/ anything from Buffalo making jokes about missing teeth is the definition if irony!! :headscrat

You went to college?

justasportsfan

09-09-2010, 02:24 PM

They should rename the team Havana Delfins. Proudly owned by Gloria Estefan, Marc Anthony and J Lo.

DolfanTom

09-09-2010, 02:26 PM

You went to college?

Yes, and it was in Western New York too, so I should probably stop making fun of it!!

justasportsfan

09-09-2010, 02:28 PM

Yes, and it was in Western New York too, so I should probably stop making fun of it!!

NIce to know NY taxes are still giving out welfare education to special children .

DolfanTom

09-09-2010, 02:32 PM

NIce to know NY taxes are still giving out welfare education to special children .

:blahblah:

My college loans say far different! :teary:

SabreEleven

09-09-2010, 02:42 PM

Yes, and it was in Western New York too, so I should probably stop making fun of it!!

and probably paid atttention.

DolfanTom

09-09-2010, 02:44 PM

and probably paid atttention.

Certainly was smart enough to not become a Bills fan!!

SabreEleven

09-09-2010, 02:47 PM

Certainly was smart enough to not become a Bills fan!!

and smart enough to become a fan that sports teal and orange.

DolfanTom

09-09-2010, 02:50 PM

and smart enough to become a fan that sports teal and orange.
As opposed to one w/ a dorky looking cartoonish dumb, slow, cow-like mammal on its helmet???

SabreEleven

09-09-2010, 03:00 PM

As opposed to one w/ a dorky looking cartoonish dumb, slow, cow-like mammal on its helmet???

The team with the gayest uniform in the league has no room to talk. You have flipper w/ a football helmet on your helmet.

Bufftp

09-09-2010, 03:15 PM

and smart enough to become a fan that sports teal and orange.
that's more of an "orientation" thing......

ddaryl

09-09-2010, 03:16 PM

I plagarized these

What do Billy Graham and the Miami Dolphins have in common? They make 70,000 people stand up and yell "Jesus Christ"

What's the difference between the Miami Dolphins and a dollar bill? You can still get four quarters out of a dollar.

What do possums and the Miami Dolphins have in common? They play dead at home and get killed on the road.

Police, the National Guard, and the FBI were called out to Dolphin Stadium this week. Players on the field reported seeing a strange, white substance on the field that they had never seen before. Miami CSI took samples and determined that the substance did not come from Cocaine anthrax or ricin, It was, instead, a Goal Line.

did I mention I stole those

Buffalo Thriller

09-09-2010, 03:44 PM

Florida is the pimple on the ass of America. Watch out for these inbred bumpkins at the RALPH!

Captain gameboy

09-09-2010, 03:51 PM

How do you get Dolphin fans to patronize your bar?

Turn the barstools upside-down.

X-Era

09-09-2010, 04:38 PM

Florida is the distended hemorrhoid of America... and Miami is a "cling-on"

tatersalad

09-09-2010, 04:44 PM

dolfan fans r like a shotgun 2 ***** they blow

Bufftp

09-09-2010, 04:50 PM

How do you keep Chad Henne out of your back yard?

Put up Goal Post's.

BidsJr

09-09-2010, 05:30 PM

I have a great one.

Why did the Dolphin cross the road?

Answer:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHg5SJYRHA0

Bufftp

09-09-2010, 05:51 PM

Bufftp

09-09-2010, 05:54 PM

A blond Dolphin fan called 911 on her cell phone to report that her car has been broken into. She is hysterical as she explains her situation to the dispatcher: "They've stolen the stereo, the steering wheel, the brake pedal and even the accelerator!" she cried. The dispatcher said, "Stay calm. An officer is on the way."

A few minutes later, the officer radios in. "Disregard." He says. "She got in the back-seat by mistake."

Mike13

09-09-2010, 08:20 PM

Should be easy- they are the Dolphelons after all.

Yeah, becaus the Bills are always Saints.
:bs: and you know it.

Florida is the trailer park of the country.

Outside of New England and NYC the entire Northeast is made up of white trash.

BertSquirtgum

09-09-2010, 09:45 PM

Yeah, becaus the Bills are always Saints.
:bs: and you know it.

Outside of New England and NYC the entire Northeast is made up of white trash.
probably the most ignorant post in the history of this site. don't be mad your boys are going to get butt raped by the 2nd worst team in the NFL on sunday

kelly2reed4six

09-09-2010, 10:45 PM

How about a classic?

A small boy was spotted by police in Dade County, Florida carrying his belongings tied in a bandana on a stick over his shoulder. Instantly recognizing the boy as a runaway, the officer told him to get in the car and would take him home to his dad.
"Oh no, please don't do that. My mom and I left dad because he beats me."
So the police officer offered to take him home to his mom.
"Oh no, please don't do that. My mom beats me, too!" the boy cried.
The officer was perplexed. "Well where should I take you then?"
"Take me to Dolphin Stadium. I know the Dolphins don't beat anybody."

Historian

09-10-2010, 06:13 AM

5 star thread!

Keep them coming!

Dr. Lecter

09-10-2010, 06:25 AM

Mrs. Smith was asking her students what their parents did for a living.

Little Johnny raised his hand and said "My dad is a fireman!"

Little Susie raised her hand and said "My Dad is a doctor and my mom is lawyer!"

This went on until Mrs. Smith noticed that Danny had not raised his hand.

"Danny, what does your Daddy do for a living?"

"My Daddy dances in a bar and takes his clothes off for other men. Sometimes, if they give him extra money, he will go in the backroom and have sex with them."

Mrs. Smith was mortified. She took Danny aside and asked him if that was true.

"No, it isn't, Mrs. Smith."

"Danny, why would you tell a lie like that?"

"I'm embarrassed by what my dad does for a living."

"Danny, what could be more embarrassing than what you said?"

"Well, my dad plays for the Miami Dolphins."

X-Era

09-10-2010, 07:05 AM

http://lh3.ggpht.com/_XGcFR-qoELk/TIoebyONpaI/AAAAAAAAABY/74HkHTkpHkY/fin%20fan.jpg

Classic Fin fan in Buffalo. He's got his foot snuggies on.

Mike13

09-10-2010, 12:44 PM

He's in Boston.

X-Era

09-10-2010, 12:49 PM

He's in Boston.

Foxboro actually.

But, my imagery works, play along.